Monday, May 14, 2012
Something to Ponder
Sometimes the universe does some crazy shit to my life and I can't figure out if that means that I'm doing things right or if it's just fucking with me. Like deja vu gives me a feeling like I am in the exact right place at the exact right time. I read that somewhere, Sylvia Browne maybe in my days of spirituality 101, but anyway it rings true. Like how my daughter's dad came back into my life after so long through that facebook message and then shortly after that I heard from a long lost friend via facebook. Now this is not some friend, she was the best friend I have ever had but our friendship ended years ago for what seem like stupid reasons. I reached out to her once, right after I got married but she shot me down and I figured that meant the reasons must not have been stupid and I tried to let it go. I have missed her terribly. I have missed her most at the really important milestones in my life like the birth of my son, my graduations, my divorce, and I have always wondered what has been going on with her. But now even though we are facebook friends I have no idea how to talk to her. But I wonder if there is a connection between my daughter's dad coming into my life and then her. Like his return necessitates hers. Like the universe knows I am going to need her to deal with what is to come. Maybe I am making too much of this. Maybe we will just keep each other at a distance and look at each others' pictures and whatnot and that will be that because I do have friends, good friends, but I don't have her. And there is something fishy about the timing. Just makes me think.